Freedom From Loneliness, Unworthiness, Self-Loathing & Shame

 I've been a born again believer in the Lord Jesus Christ for over twenty years. For allot of those years I've have been active in various church leadership roles. I loved God, spent time in the Scriptures and prayer daily (most days), tithed, and have done some missions work, but I could only seem to get so far in my spiritual life.

I'd be cruising along in a measure of happiness kind of like on a warm sunny day. Then something would happen. It's as if thick chain would get wrapped around my waist would pull me backward as a prisoner into a dark cave of loneliness, un-worthiness, self-loathing, shame and emotional defeat. There in the cave I'd be subjected to what felt like incessant condemning and suicidal thoughts. It was like loud tapes playing that could not be stopped. I'd lose momentum and end up just numbly going through the motions trying to hold things together in my life.